Funniest Jokes Of All Time

There is an American, a German and a Mexican. They are in all in a boat. The boat is about to sink. Each of them have to throw things out to make the boat lighter.

The German throws out 4 cases of beer and says, "we have a lot of bear in Germany so we do not need these!"

The Mexican throws out 5 cases of burritos and says, "we have a lot of burritos in Mexico so we do not need these!"

The American grabs the Mexican and throws him out.

The German ask why he threws the Mexican out.

And the American replies, "we have a lot of Mexicans in American so we do not need him!"

What do you call someone who speaks three languages ?

- "Multilingual"

What do you call someone who speaks two languages ?

- "Bilingual"

What do you call someone who speaks one language ?

- "An American"

An American was telling one of his favorite jokes to a group of friends. "Hell is a place where the cooks are British. the waiters are French, the policemen are Germans, and the trains are run by Italians."

The lone European in the group pondered all this for a second and responded, "I can not say about the police and the trains, but you're probably right about going out to eat. A restaurant in Hell would be one where the cooks are British and the waiters are French - and the customers are all Americans."

While visiting a retirement community, my wife and i decided to do some shopping and soon become separated.

"Excuse me," I said, approaching a clerk. "I am looking for my wife. She has white hair and is wearing white shoes."

Gesturing around the store, the clerk responded, "Take your pick."

Retirement is the best thing that has happened to my brother-in-law.

"I never know what day of the week it is," he gloated. "All I know is, the day the big paper comes, I have to dress up and go to church."